There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize