I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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