Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize