So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
