You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
