I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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