i just wanna soil my oats bro
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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