He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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