I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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