we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
