Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
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"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
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My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Randomize