Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I will pee on everything he values.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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