How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
