You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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