Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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