Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
