last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
