you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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