____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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