he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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