3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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