why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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