Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Girls should come with a carfax report
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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