North Korea, Best Korea!
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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