It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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