Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
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