no. you can't hotbox the world.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
