I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I understand Curling. That high.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
