How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize