i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
