Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize