Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
