i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
