I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Randomize