He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Randomize
