HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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