i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
