I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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