Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  So drunk its hurt

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  (810): So drunk its hurt http://tfl.nu/8w92
  Replies (3) Good night (1059) Bad night (526)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.

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  (256): Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference. http://tfl.nu/q39i
  Replies (33) Good night (3786) Bad night (1258)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you

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  (207): so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you http://tfl.nu/yn2g
  Replies (9) Good night (4460) Bad night (778)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!

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  (480): YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST (602): I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise! http://tfl.nu/2ck7
  Replies (36) Good night (6930) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.

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  (203): This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning. http://tfl.nu/sy0s
  Replies (23) Good night (1402) Bad night (3497)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice

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  (443): we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice http://tfl.nu/hzcq
  Replies (10) Good night (6045) Bad night (1620)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight

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  (412): I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight http://tfl.nu/88wf
  Replies (8) Good night (3567) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.

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  (541): It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home. http://tfl.nu/scuu
  Replies (13) Good night (4049) Bad night (1114)
• Favorite

  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.

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  (+64): I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable. http://tfl.nu/t0un
  Replies (4) Good night (2311) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.

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  (727): Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome. http://tfl.nu/3ucr
  Replies (20) Good night (1924) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?

  (516): View more from New York

  lol... you weighed it?

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  (631): Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night? (516): lol... you weighed it? http://tfl.nu/fdcm
  Replies (11) Good night (3940) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.

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  (215): I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa. http://tfl.nu/hvqf
  Replies (4) Good night (1266) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.

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  (602): Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side. http://tfl.nu/uoi7
  Replies (2) Good night (842) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.

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  (201): I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part. http://tfl.nu/8mau
  Replies (7) Good night (720) Bad night (1400)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting

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  (707): Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting http://tfl.nu/qvl5
  Replies (0) Good night (421) Bad night (206)

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