is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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