on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
