so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
