i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I wish I only lived at night.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
