and my herpes radar will keep us safe
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
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Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
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I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
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