Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
