I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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