yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
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