I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
