The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
