I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize