And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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